From experiences over the past month or so, I have begun to understand at least partially how communication used to be in the old days. In so many movies , you watch the protagonist bug the postman, as to whether any mail has arrived(Pather Panchali, though in a different context, was the last movie in which i saw this). Especially when he is expecting the results of some job application or test. And then when the postman replies in the negative, see the protoganist give a look of extreme dejection, and sometimes extreme desperation.
Well, these days most of my friends and me do the same thing. Except that instead of bugging the postman, each day we sign into our mail ids, just to see INBOX (0). And in the rare case that you do have unread mail, open the inbox just to see that you have a mail from WINDOWS LIVE telling you about IM! in love. As though you care if windows live is in love with yahoo who decided to jilt his advances.
I guess at least in the old days you could have bugged the postman as to whether he was sure that no mail addressed to me has come. You could also tell him that it would be extremely nice if he would deliver the mail from ABC university as soon as he sees it. And possibly when he does deliver it, see some sort of happiness on his face too. In this context, e-mail is extremely frustrating. Here you can't even vent your frustrations at hotmail or gmail.
Another incident that makes me reminesce about postal mail was ironically an e-mail ireceived from a friend recently. The mail was one of those nice mails, which people write for no particular reason except to keep in touch. It rambled about and talked about a lot of things and about nothing. And as I was reading it, it made me think how nice would it have been, if such a mail had come out of the blue, by post. Joy, I guess, is delivered in packages like these.
But noone writes mail like that anymore. Not even in the English composition period at school, which incidentally was the last time I wrote such a letter. It would be nice if people (including me) get back to the habit of letter writing and then sending them by post!!!
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Farewell College - written on last day of theory classes
Today I bid thee farewell
For we may never again meet
After enjoying te beautiful sunshine
Into the sunset we now retreat.
Tomorrow I'll be just a faded memory
For every dusk precedes a new dawn
Many pages would have by then turned
This chapter would have been long gone.
Today i bid thee farewell
For our paths did once meet.
After running together on the highway
we split on the tune of the beating retreat.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
A Rolling Stone
Its such a pain to be pushed around
Not being able to fix your ground
You wish to do one thing,
but are forced to do another.
To resist is an option,
But you know you won't take it ever.
Resistance you know is but futile,
For the thoughts in you head are ephermal and light.
You want to do something today,
But tomorrow that will seem forced anyway
It is such a pain to be pushed around
More so when others have their purposes found!
Not being able to fix your ground
You wish to do one thing,
but are forced to do another.
To resist is an option,
But you know you won't take it ever.
Resistance you know is but futile,
For the thoughts in you head are ephermal and light.
You want to do something today,
But tomorrow that will seem forced anyway
It is such a pain to be pushed around
More so when others have their purposes found!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Cow Swats Mosquito mercilessly
Blue Cross in Dilema
In major developments emanating from Chennai a cow swatted a mosquito to within inches of his life. This mosquito, who was the cow's ex had now become an irritant to her as he was coming in the way of her new love interest, a creature which looks like solidified coca cola with a porcupine head.
The police have decided to arrest the cow and this has put the Blue Cross in huge dilema. By the principles on which the bluw cross was established, it has to protect all animals from human attrocities. But if it was seen as supporting the cow, the powerful mosquito lobby(the main attack weapon of the animals against humans) will be offended and may even choose to support the humans to avenge this.
Operation Naren's Treat Successful
After a week of intense planning and military like execution, the Charity of Blessed Thought announced on saturday the success of its massive fund raising drive called Operation Naren's Treat. A fact known to only a select few till saturday was that the operation's code name amongst the top brass of the charity was operation treat Naren and not naren's treat.
A total of Rs. 1478/- was raised from this drive informed the charity's head Bharat Sridhar. He also added that the major contributors were Miss Raashi S, Miss Nandini M and Miss Ramya N who wished to repay the debt to society they incurred by torturing a poor mosquito and the cow he lusted after. (To the uninitiated, Suhas is often called Kosu)
Another noteworthy contributor was Miss Anuja C who wished to share the joy she got by doing well in her examinations qwith people who were less priviliged.
Bharat S, who also heads the Centre for Boyish Timepass also informed us that he was now getting threats from various quarters and had even considered going underground. But he decided against it as he felt that the people issuing these threats weren't competent enough to do anything to such a benovelent person as himself.
Those who read the above article will also be interested in
1.Mission Nuclear Movement Accomplished
2. Cow swats mosquito mercilessly; Blue Cross in Dilema
A total of Rs. 1478/- was raised from this drive informed the charity's head Bharat Sridhar. He also added that the major contributors were Miss Raashi S, Miss Nandini M and Miss Ramya N who wished to repay the debt to society they incurred by torturing a poor mosquito and the cow he lusted after. (To the uninitiated, Suhas is often called Kosu)
Another noteworthy contributor was Miss Anuja C who wished to share the joy she got by doing well in her examinations qwith people who were less priviliged.
Bharat S, who also heads the Centre for Boyish Timepass also informed us that he was now getting threats from various quarters and had even considered going underground. But he decided against it as he felt that the people issuing these threats weren't competent enough to do anything to such a benovelent person as himself.
Those who read the above article will also be interested in
1.Mission Nuclear Movement Accomplished
2. Cow swats mosquito mercilessly; Blue Cross in Dilema
Saturday, August 2, 2008
5 most boring jobs on earth
First thing first. what is a job. a job is something that you choose to do. Nothing that is forced on you is counted. So something like the chinese water torture won't count.
So here goes the list:
5. Cook at the Anna University canteens: Lets go through a day in the life of a cook at the anna university canteen. Wake up, make sambhar, chutney, pongal, dosa batter and puri dough. Everything so close in taste with the day before's stuff and the day before that and so on, that you will be tempted to give them six sigma. Once this is done, prepare lunch. Same procedure. Make rice, sambhar, rasam, dry vegetable, kootu and churn buttermilk. No change in procedure day in and day out. Only the vegetabble changes. Here also the cook has no change from the mundane. Its the guy who buys vegetable who can have some fun. After this prepare for evening and night canteens. Prepare 'chola puri' batter , make mini idlis, make some weird rice dish, make biryani for the night canteenand then finally hang your boots.(the biryani has a nice story. they prepare chicken biryani. when the pieces get over they sell the same stuff as egg biryani, and when the egg also gets over they sell it as khukha) 365 days a year. No change in anything. They are so used to it that the taste also doesn't change.
4. Read Brat's poetry: Douglas Adams got it wrong. The world's worst poetry isn't written by some in a village in England. Its written by a dude residing in the A.U hostels in Chennai. The only reason why his intestine hasn't choked him yet is that the dude is extra intelligent and may get a nobel prize for saving humanity by some great discovery he makes.
3. Attending Sankaran's classes post lunch: The dude is so boring, in the words of Ashwin or R.S(they are still fighting for the copyright) that if I were him I'd avoid myself. And after lunch if you have attend a double class of his, it is nothing short of violation of human rights. Anyone beyond the 3rd row can't possibly stay awake. Technically people in the first 3 rows also shouldn't be able to stay awake, but those people have somehow managed to gain immunity to boredom. People from the 3rd row to the last but one do weird things to stay awake because tey are scared of the dude. People in the last row, like yours truly, just sleep.
2. Asssume a guy driving a motorbike. Very intelligent chap. So intelligent he thinks he doesn't need such acccessories like helmets. Assume he is driving at over 100kmph and suddenly out of a side street comes a Scorpio. Dude gets a free ticket to fly and lands on hospital bed with fractures or injuries everywhere from jaw to arms to region around gluteus maximus. So stuck on hospital bed. Only thing to see is the ceiling. Can't speak as jaw bandaged. cant move. cant even scratch his butt if some bug goes and irritates. Yeah it is boring and he chose to be there.(this reminds me of a brilliant ad for safe driving. driving at 40kmph may be boring. but a hospital ceiling is even more so!!!)
1. Undoubtedly the most boring job on Earth is that of a Goods train guard. No jokes. These guys are the furthest away from civilization inspite of in many cases being right in the middle of it. All they have to do is be 60 compartment away from the nearest human, sit in a caboose, and show the green flag if any train passes by. and yeah write down the kilometre mark in his log book where that train passed. then sit in your caboose doing nothing except wait for the next train. No one to speak to. Atleast the guy in the hospital can sleep!!
Add to this list. think of the most boring jobs that possibly can be there.
So here goes the list:
5. Cook at the Anna University canteens: Lets go through a day in the life of a cook at the anna university canteen. Wake up, make sambhar, chutney, pongal, dosa batter and puri dough. Everything so close in taste with the day before's stuff and the day before that and so on, that you will be tempted to give them six sigma. Once this is done, prepare lunch. Same procedure. Make rice, sambhar, rasam, dry vegetable, kootu and churn buttermilk. No change in procedure day in and day out. Only the vegetabble changes. Here also the cook has no change from the mundane. Its the guy who buys vegetable who can have some fun. After this prepare for evening and night canteens. Prepare 'chola puri' batter , make mini idlis, make some weird rice dish, make biryani for the night canteenand then finally hang your boots.(the biryani has a nice story. they prepare chicken biryani. when the pieces get over they sell the same stuff as egg biryani, and when the egg also gets over they sell it as khukha) 365 days a year. No change in anything. They are so used to it that the taste also doesn't change.
4. Read Brat's poetry: Douglas Adams got it wrong. The world's worst poetry isn't written by some in a village in England. Its written by a dude residing in the A.U hostels in Chennai. The only reason why his intestine hasn't choked him yet is that the dude is extra intelligent and may get a nobel prize for saving humanity by some great discovery he makes.
3. Attending Sankaran's classes post lunch: The dude is so boring, in the words of Ashwin or R.S(they are still fighting for the copyright) that if I were him I'd avoid myself. And after lunch if you have attend a double class of his, it is nothing short of violation of human rights. Anyone beyond the 3rd row can't possibly stay awake. Technically people in the first 3 rows also shouldn't be able to stay awake, but those people have somehow managed to gain immunity to boredom. People from the 3rd row to the last but one do weird things to stay awake because tey are scared of the dude. People in the last row, like yours truly, just sleep.
2. Asssume a guy driving a motorbike. Very intelligent chap. So intelligent he thinks he doesn't need such acccessories like helmets. Assume he is driving at over 100kmph and suddenly out of a side street comes a Scorpio. Dude gets a free ticket to fly and lands on hospital bed with fractures or injuries everywhere from jaw to arms to region around gluteus maximus. So stuck on hospital bed. Only thing to see is the ceiling. Can't speak as jaw bandaged. cant move. cant even scratch his butt if some bug goes and irritates. Yeah it is boring and he chose to be there.(this reminds me of a brilliant ad for safe driving. driving at 40kmph may be boring. but a hospital ceiling is even more so!!!)
1. Undoubtedly the most boring job on Earth is that of a Goods train guard. No jokes. These guys are the furthest away from civilization inspite of in many cases being right in the middle of it. All they have to do is be 60 compartment away from the nearest human, sit in a caboose, and show the green flag if any train passes by. and yeah write down the kilometre mark in his log book where that train passed. then sit in your caboose doing nothing except wait for the next train. No one to speak to. Atleast the guy in the hospital can sleep!!
Add to this list. think of the most boring jobs that possibly can be there.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Mission: Nuclear movement, Accomplished
In dramatic developments that began unfolding monday morning, The Centre for Boyish Timepass(CBT, also called the Centre for Bull shiT) informed news agencies that the mission nuclear movement was a phenomenal success. The mission, which was a huge joint effort, combining the talents of people based out of Mumbai, Chennai and Bangalore, was the result of careful planning over 2 weeks.
Weak intelligence inputs were being received by CBT for over a month, but on 21st june RAW agent Balram Naidu, sent definite information with agent 740 that there was huge disturbances near Jakkore, Bangalore and that a major catastrophe was in the offing. On receiving the information, Naren Ganpathi, Head of Operations at CBT, based out of chennai, decided to advance the coming of the catastrophe and if possible make it even bigger. So a plan was hatched. The mission was initially called Nuclear Movement into suhas' heart.(for those weak in hindi, nuclear is anu and movement can also be termed as ja) But it seemed a lot like a clue for a cryptic crossword, and invaribly people would think the answer is an anagram of suhas, and then try to figure out who or what hasus or usash or something of that sort was. Not realising that Suhas himself was the person involved. Another name that was thought of was Mission nuclear bomb(nuclear = anu; bomb = gundu = fat; as to what she is). But due to fear of sanctions this name was also rejected. Finally it was agreed that the name mission nuclear movement was good enough.
once the name was decided, Naren Ganpathy ordered agent 740 to return to bangalore and carry out the sensitive mission. she was asked to deliver a Meillandine Rose to the source of nuclear energy on the 30th of june. The date was chosen as it was on this day 20 years ago the reactor went into operation with the first controlled fission reaction. A card with a cryptic message, which implied some sensuality was also to be attached.
This part of the plan was implemented successfully but for one hitch. The sensuality was misinterpreted as brotherly love. But not ones to give up , agent 740 with loads of help from agent 753 began planting doubts into the control system of the nuclear reactor. At around the same time, the head of CBT 05, Brat was also informed that a fake id similar to suhas' had been created and was ready for use(agent 753s brilliant idea). Bringing all his experience into play, he shot of a communication , as though from suhas to a Miss. Anuja. The letter didn't leave much to the imagination, and was frightfully direct. The mission was accomplished.
The catastrophe could have been grander had it not been for interference from the left parties(read heart/courage) of Suhas who threatened to withdraw support from the centre, as they felt joining forces with the liberals would be against their ideology. But, we are informed by sources, that the prime misinster is still very keen that the deal go through, and may even ask CBT to take the deal to the IAWA(international anuja wooing agency?) in the near future.
note: all characters in this report are fictional. any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. this is especially true of the characther brat, who though alive at present, after writing this and the letter may not survive too long.
all things done were done in pure jest, assuming suhas' and anuja's sense of humour. any inconvenience caused is definitely not regretted.
Weak intelligence inputs were being received by CBT for over a month, but on 21st june RAW agent Balram Naidu, sent definite information with agent 740 that there was huge disturbances near Jakkore, Bangalore and that a major catastrophe was in the offing. On receiving the information, Naren Ganpathi, Head of Operations at CBT, based out of chennai, decided to advance the coming of the catastrophe and if possible make it even bigger. So a plan was hatched. The mission was initially called Nuclear Movement into suhas' heart.(for those weak in hindi, nuclear is anu and movement can also be termed as ja) But it seemed a lot like a clue for a cryptic crossword, and invaribly people would think the answer is an anagram of suhas, and then try to figure out who or what hasus or usash or something of that sort was. Not realising that Suhas himself was the person involved. Another name that was thought of was Mission nuclear bomb(nuclear = anu; bomb = gundu = fat; as to what she is). But due to fear of sanctions this name was also rejected. Finally it was agreed that the name mission nuclear movement was good enough.
once the name was decided, Naren Ganpathy ordered agent 740 to return to bangalore and carry out the sensitive mission. she was asked to deliver a Meillandine Rose to the source of nuclear energy on the 30th of june. The date was chosen as it was on this day 20 years ago the reactor went into operation with the first controlled fission reaction. A card with a cryptic message, which implied some sensuality was also to be attached.
This part of the plan was implemented successfully but for one hitch. The sensuality was misinterpreted as brotherly love. But not ones to give up , agent 740 with loads of help from agent 753 began planting doubts into the control system of the nuclear reactor. At around the same time, the head of CBT 05, Brat was also informed that a fake id similar to suhas' had been created and was ready for use(agent 753s brilliant idea). Bringing all his experience into play, he shot of a communication , as though from suhas to a Miss. Anuja. The letter didn't leave much to the imagination, and was frightfully direct. The mission was accomplished.
The catastrophe could have been grander had it not been for interference from the left parties(read heart/courage) of Suhas who threatened to withdraw support from the centre, as they felt joining forces with the liberals would be against their ideology. But, we are informed by sources, that the prime misinster is still very keen that the deal go through, and may even ask CBT to take the deal to the IAWA(international anuja wooing agency?) in the near future.
note: all characters in this report are fictional. any resemblance to anyone living or dead is purely coincidental. this is especially true of the characther brat, who though alive at present, after writing this and the letter may not survive too long.
all things done were done in pure jest, assuming suhas' and anuja's sense of humour. any inconvenience caused is definitely not regretted.
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